You were married for a couple of years and being termed by friends as 'lou-fu-lou-cai' (old couple / long-time couple; something like that). Both of you have good career and you really seldom see each other during weekdays. But you guys are happy and have a good relationship.
One day, you felt tired and decided to head home early. When you reached home, you heard some sound coming from your locked bedroom. Your worst nightmare has happened. Your spouse is inside your bedroom with another partner! You stood there, stunned, not knowing what to do or how to react. You decided to just sit at the living room and wait.
Ok... not going into detail of what happened next as I also cannot imagine. The thing is, when this happens, what's next?
This is a common scenario that I see among some of my friends. Most of the cases does not even involved catching your other half with another man or woman. It can simply be... no longer communicating, cannot get along well, different opinion, etc etc. Thousands of reasons for a couple to act cold towards one another. Sad but true.
If, there are no children in this scenario, the chances are - divorce. Simple, clean, easy... you go your way, I go mine.
But, if kids are involved, many couples tend to still stay on together just for the sake of the kids. But are they happy? I really do not know how a person can pretend to be happy with one another in front of the kids and some even hide this fact from their family members or friends. Isn't it awkward when a relative or friend started to ask you about your other half, and you have to answer it like nothing bad happened between the both of you?
I don't know if this will happen to me in the future, but I hope not. But if it really does happen, at this time, I don't know what I will do.
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7 comments:
First and foremost, don't let it happen on the first place.
The moment anything goes amiss, look into it. It would be too late to cure by the time is already rotten.
But if your S.O is cheating behind your back.(Intentionally)
Don't be caught dumbstruck.
Remember where you placed your camera. Take a good snapshot and good for court evidence.
If you caught evidence of cheating on you. Then you'll likely get more "cut" for divorce settlement. Protect yourself since your S.O doesn't care to protect your feelings.
S.O = significant other (male / female)
hahaha...another fun novel.
It won't happen in your own bedroom; it may happen somewhere, in hotels or beach.
If it happen in your bedroom, get out fast, fast, fast...no answers or explanation required. No children can stop the departure. There's no reason to continue. It's betrayal; it's treason!!!
But if it happens elsewhere, and not caught red-handed, that's a dilemma, often.
Men would by nature trespass their fidelity, though many will deny and the younger men don't think so because they are more moral and have true and pure love. I was a 20-something too and idealistic too. But idealism and cognitivism cannot transgress realism and objectivism. Ultimately, the journey of life will have to pass the gorgeous and terrains and some will have to fall sideways while others will journey on invincibly.
Fundamental: live your life to the fullest and make your day fun and fulfilling. Leave the unknowns to remain as unknowns and take it on when it comes. It's life's journey and challenges.
i hope this is not another 'friend' of yours... know what i mean.
It didn't happen to me, at my bed room. But it should be somewhere else. As I knew my ex-bf had another gf.
I thought I could be very angry, and cannot forgive him forever.
The fact is, I forgive him, and didn't really mind at that time. But I didn't hope to get back together anymore. Just let the relationship end.
Ahmog: Easier said than done that we should not let it happen in the first place. If our SO wants to stray, what can we do to stop them wor?
Maverick: Ya... I understand what you mean. Though my hubby says that he will not do such thing to me, I think it is something that he should not say it too early. Unless he is penniless, but when a man started to have a good career and money, anything could happen.
Zewt: 'Friends' of mine. And I mean, friends. Not one incident, but many incidents.
MinHui: It was easy for you let it go... still at the pak-tor stage. Can you imagine if you were married?
ugh! i would divorce. no questions asked. no explanation needed.
it's really freaky though..i had a nightmare that my boo ishaving an affair outside..i woke up feeling like i could kill him! hahahahahah
i've seen many broken marriages in my life...too many...and the cause? infidelity..if u get good snaptshots of it, according to Malaysian law, the other woman/manwill have to pay RM60K in penalty..as for the cheating hubby/wife, i'm not too sure about the penalty..but then again, would u wanna divorce (with or without kids)..
i believe in being a tolerant partner, talk things out, make things work, and give each other a chance.
If happen only 1 time, i think i would give my other half a chance...anyway, wedding vows are about being together till death do us part, for better or for worst, in good health or bad, etc...isn't it??
how come divorce so easily just because it's a hurdle or test given by God or maybe it is the devil at work here?
but if it's something which occurs more than once, then definitely divorce-lah.
What i would do is, try to find out if there's something missing in our relationship that causes one party to stray, maybe something that has gone wrong with us...whatever it is, it's definitely clear communication.
Of course easier said than done..but if it happens to u or anyone, just don't make rash decisions..must always have a clear mind before communicating with ur partner or it might turn out worst :-)
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